Alone

"I feel as though my life has never existed, sometimes I feel as though I would rather be not on earth, but when I think of other people around the world in a worst case scenario, I change my mind, I feel emotional sometimes, who doesn't?

I feel happy at times, I keep my feelings deep inside, inside of me, it seemed infinity, I have little friends, yet I know so many names, I have ideas, but no one to express it to, I have creativity, but no one seems to appreciate it, I have thoughts of this and that, and nobody supported me, I have feelings, don't I?

I feel ups and downs, and when I'm down, the negative side of me rushes in, as though I'm another planet, and the rivers are just waiting to drown me with their powerful waters, I feel as though I have no one to turn to, I think that when my friends are around me, it seemed priceless, yet to them its just another bunch of friends.

Why then was I sent here? Why then was I sent down to earth to do nothing but remain all alone? Why then was I created? Why then do I add people I know?

I need to express my feelings, but yet I have nobody to do so, I feel as though I'm the only one on earth here, like a shadow, covering every movement, only noticeable when the sun is high.

Sometimes I feel as though I am here for a purpose, I can't save myself, but I can save others. I feel...lonely. I need company, every time I tried searching, my searching seemed endless, it seemed as though my search was never gonna end.

How I wished I could be more like a normal human. I have no idea why I am like this, maybe you could tell me why? Please? As I sat and wrote this down, tears begun flowing from my eyes, I feel warm on my cheeks, I feel saltiness on my lips, I feel as though I am. Alone?

Giving me their attention when I am not needed, leaving me all confused and lost when they have someone better to talk to, I feel as though I am like a soft toy, I feel used, but do I say it? No. I keep it deep within my heart, locked with a code nobody knows, and would open it only when I am feeling totally down. Like now.

Sometimes I feel as though I am not appreciated, I know I have done wrongs, who has not? I know what I have done, but could not people just be like me? Am I being selfish or just honestly weird? Friends I consider best friends did not turn out good. They call me when they are bored, they call me when they have nothing to do, and they leave me when there is nothing left to say or do.

Now? I am ready with this friend of mine, a nice cool little plastic toy, as I refer it too, its design seemed for a purpose, there was a lock on it, I pressed it and out came a holder. It felt cold and I touched with all my feelings, I aimed it up on my soft skull and was ready to pull it, but before I post this. Good luck in your life everybody, I am a liability in life. Goodbye.

Signed by,
Me."

Regards, the Author

+ All Rights Reserved.® Copyright© [bwyc©2009] +